Christian Democrat:
They own two cows. Their neighbour owns none.
They keep one and give the other to their poor neighbour.
Afterwards they regret it.
Socialist:
They own two cows. Their neighbour owns none.
The government takes one away and gives it to their neighbour.
They are forced to join an agricultural collective in order to help
their neighbour care for the animal.
Social Democrat:
They own two cows. Their neighbour owns none.
They feel guilty, so they vote for a government that taxes their cows. In order to pay the taxes they have to sell one. The government takes their money, buys a cow, and gives it to their neighbour. They feel self-righteous. Udo Lindenberg sings for them.
Free Democrat:
They own two cows. Their neighbour owns none.
So what?
Communist:
They own two cows. Their neighbour owns none.
The government confiscates both cows and sells them the milk. They have to wait in line for hours for the milk. It is sour.
Capitalist:
They own two cows. They sell one and buy a bull in order to breed a herd.
EU Bureaucracy:
They own two cows. The EU takes both away, slaughters one, and milks the other. The EU pays them an indemnity for the loss of milk income and dumps the milk into the North Sea.
American business enterprise:
They own two cows. They sell one and lease it back. They form a corporation and compel the cows to produce four times as much milk. They are surprised when one dies. They hold a press conference and announce that their costs have gone down 50%.Their stock values rise.
French business enterprise.
They own two cows. They go on strike because they want three.
They go out to lunch. Life is beautiful.
Japanese business enterprise:
They own two cows. Using the latest genetic technology they reduce the cows to a tenth of their former size with a twenty-fold increase in milk production. Then they come up with a clever cow cartoon, call if Cowkimon, and market it world-wide.
German business enterprise:
They own two cows. Using modern genetics the cows are redesigned so that they are all blond, drink gallons of beer, produce loads of milk, and can run at 160 kilometers per hour. Unfortunately,the cows demand 13 weeks vacation each year.
British business enterprise:
They own two cows. Both of them are crazy.
Italian business enterprise.
They own two cows, but they don't know where they are.
While looking for the cows they meet a beautiful woman.
They take a lunch break. Life is beautiful.
